Survival, Optionality, and Devotion Mentality

I. Survival

May we begin with a photograph?

For decades I believed my parent’s use of their oven for Tupperware storage was unique. Recently, I learned this behavior is common among immigrants - and repeated by their non-immigrant children.

May this reveal something deeper?

Perhaps, a manifestation of the immigrant survival mentality. A mentality naturally concerned with accumulation and preservation. A mentality so engrained, that decades later, continues to direct their behavior.

And, a mentality imparted unto us, their children.

II. Survival to Optionality

Perhaps, like our parents, our survival mentality leads us to remarkable achievements. Then, silently and invisibly, our survival mentality becomes an obstacle.

Because our parent’s experience differs from ours, operating with a survival mentality is outdated and unnecessary for us. Further, it presents a significant risk to our future potential, self-realization, and fulfillment.

And, our survival mentality is usually imperceptible to us. To illustrate, humbly allow me to share a few examples of how the survival mentality manifested in my life:

• Rushing through my formal education to start making money (security);

• Accepting the first job offer extended, each time (certainty);

• Changing jobs based on pay, regardless how small the increase (accumulation); and

• Failing to reflect, and consider available alternatives (desperation).

Because we are usually blind to our survival mentality, we also misapply it across dimensions of our lives. Put another way, we fail to discern when circumstances demand a different approach from us (ie. treating relationships as competitions, or perceiving time as our enemy).

In short, our parent’s survival mentality was necessary - for them.

Their sacrifices granted us stability, the luxury to explore options, and the choice to live differently.

When we choose an optionality mentality, may we be honoring their lives and ours?

III. Optionality to Devotion

It seems we have been offered a generational and Divine invitation to evolve:

• To exercise patience with opportunities;

• To perceive how our survival mentality deprives us, and our children; and

• To devote ourselves to a craft, with time as our ally.

And perhaps, with consistent practice and God’s grace, we may:

Evolve beyond fear, to move with faith,
Evolve beyond desire, to move intuitively,
Evolve beyond desperation, to move patiently,
Evolve beyond optionality, to move with devotion.